Dave’s 3-Word Review:
A Cartoony Disgrace.
You ever have that feeling of…refreshment? Like a long day’s work coming to a close, coming home and just relaxing because it’s over? I know I do, and you can apply this feeling to practically any situation. Like a movie! Sitting through an hour and a half of a certain film, wanting to gorge your eyeballs out can be quite exhausting. Once it’s over, you’re a happy camper. Now imagine six movies like that. Okay, so A Nightmare on Elm Street isn’t all bad, but apart from the first film, and maybe the third, the rest of the main story arc is pretty disappointing. We’ve seen Freddy die so many times now, Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare just seemed like a joking title, regardless of the fact that this really was the last Freddy story in the main arc.
This time we are introduced to a teenager with amnesia who is sent to a shelter housing for teens. When one of the organizers for the shelter looks into his history, she finds out that he came from Springfield, OH, the one town in all of the world where so many suicides and other strange deaths has literally killed every child and teenager in the city. So off she goes to Ohio, with the John Doe (and other kids in the shelter) to learn more about his life. All the meanwhile, we learn Freddy is back, and he was using the John doe to lure more kids to the town to kill, but also…it would appear that before he was killed, Freddy had a child…so they start to look into that as well. Could the John Doe be Freddy’s long-lost son?
Before I get into the nitty gritty, I just want to point out that it was a really stupid decision to try to fool us into thinking the John Doe is Freddy’s son. The dude is like 17 years old, which is around the same age as Nancy in the first film…and this takes place in 1999! No one would believe that, and simple math would tell you who the real child was. Yes, this took place in 1999, not ’91, when this film was released. Let me tell you something, you’ll sure believe it’s 1999 with Breckin Meyer’s ponytail and bickering Rosanne and Tom Arnold….yeah, no.
The movie has also gone full comedy mode. It’s almost memorable – how stupid it is. Freddy not only makes puns this time, but he also dances around, breaks the fourth wall, and my personal favorite – plays a video game. A video game, mind you, where he controls the dreamer. Enter stupid looney-toon sound effects and actions… yeah, and the last 10-15 minutes of the movie are done in 3D. How, might you ask? Well, in that last dream, the dreamer goes in with a pair of 3D glasses, and for the last sequence in the film, they pop things out at you as much as humanly possible. Since they apparently couldn’t do an entire film in 3D, they had to put all that tackiness in the last 10-15 minutes. You’ll also probably have a hard time finding a 3D version of this film, so it just ends up looking stupid.
Are you ready to hear the best part of the film? It wasn’t even Robert Englund as Freddy…which I’d normally say. I’ve grown tired of the crap the writers make him do. It was Johnny Depp, who was in it for something like 12 seconds. He made a cameo as a PSA announcer on TV. That’s it, but it was cool to see. Not sure why he decided to do it though…money probably. I guess it was a little cool to fully understand Fred Krueger’s background, and how he was raised…that was kind of interesting. At this point though, you’re just so sick and tired of the comedy that it doesn’t matter.
Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare is indeed the final film in the main story, but the same could be said if you just stop watching by the third film, which is probably a better decision.