Review – The Hitman’s Bodyguard (2017)

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the-hitmans-bodyguard-59a829eb1f3e2Well, well, well, would you look at that. It’s Director Fury and Deadpool working together…or something. What can I say? Hitman’s Bodyguard was a film I kept hearing about but never thought of it as a movie that needed to be seen…just another silly buddy cop film. Well, to be fair, it’s a little deeper than that…but in my opinion, not all that much. Let’s get into it and start with the plot.

“With his reputation in tatters after a painfully unsuccessful delivery of a distinguished Japanese client, former triple-A executive protection agent, Michael Bryce, two long years after the disgraceful incident, is now reduced to a mere second-class bodyguard for hire. Under those circumstances, Bryce would do anything to prove his worth once again, and as a result, it won’t be long before he accepts an offer from Interpol to escort the renowned international assassin Darius Kincaid from Manchester to the Hague. The task seems simple: Bryce only needs to transport the contract killer from point A to point B, nevertheless, Kincaid, as the only one with the guts and enough hard evidence to testify against a tyrannical Belarusian dictator, is an obvious target, while the trip to the Netherlands is long and hazardous. Without a doubt, this a race against the clock as the mismatched duo will have to put aside their grudges, in a non-stop concerto for bullets.” (IMDb)

Now, I really like these actors…probably more so than most people…but this film falls into the lines of “somewhat forgettable”. It’s funny in parts, but not all that funny in other parts. Had it been played by anyone else, I fear I would’ve never checked it out. Others may feel the same. When you have a comedy that you watch purely for the actors, you may have a problem. If the comedy was strong, that wouldn’t really matter, but the comedy wasn’t very strong. Like I said, it only worked sometimes, which only hurt the film in the end, I think.

This is just first impressions, of course. Let’s go ahead and break down The Hitman’s Bodyguard to interpret the stars.

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TITLE – Hitman’s Bodyguard, The
Year – 2017
Genres – Action, Comedy

PEOPLE SCORE – 6/10
Acting – 1|Characters – 1|Casting – 1|Importance – 2|Chemistry – 1

First up, we have the people category, starting off with the subcategory of acting. The acting was neither terrible or great, mostly typical and forgettable. The characters were fine, but I won’t be remembering them forever. I think everyone did a fine job in the role, but that doesn’t mean they were the only actor for the job. Absolutely every character in this film seemingly had an important role adding to the direction of the plot, They had a reason, they had a purpose, they had a history, and I love it. As far as the chemistry goes in this film, there wasn’t much of it. I think Reynolds and Jackson were fine together, but everyone else’s chemistry sort of came and went without much acknowledgment.

WRITING SCORE – 4/10
Dialogue – 1|Balanced – 2|Story – 0|Originality – 0|Interesting – 1

Next up, we have the writing category, starting off with the dialogue subcategory…which was as unremarkable and forgettable as the meal you had last Tuesday afternoon. I would certainly say that the film is also very well-balanced and consistently holds a strong focus on the story at hand. So, how was the story? To that, I say what story? Say what you will about the film, it simply has no meaningful story that really warrants a viewing. Talk about an unoriginal film, though. Not only does it ‘feel’ like we’ve seen it before, I’m pretty sure we have at this point…and multiple times, at that. I’d say I was interested enough to watch the film, but as I watched the movie, my interested died down pretty rapidly and was gone before the film ended.

BTS SCORE – 6/10
Visuals – 1|Directing – 1|Editing – 1|Advertisement – 2|Music – 1

Next up, we’re taking a look at behind-the-scenes, starting with the visuals. In this case, the visuals were pretty standard and typical to what you’d expect. Nothing blows you away, nothing looks horrible, either. It is what it is, folks. Next, we’re taking a look at the directing, which slips by without you noticing it. That’s right, there wasn’t anything difficult or challenging for the director. They could’ve hired any director for the job and the movie would be exactly the same. Nothing challenging or difficult in the editor’s desk either, folks. They stitched the movie together just fine, but there’s nothing else to report here because even a kid could probably do it. As with most films, I consider this film to be exactly as advertised, which is good. There wasn’t anything fancy or memorable about the music. It was basically as good as it needed to be in order to keep the tone in place…and that’s what they did here, as well.

NARRATIVE ARC SCORE – 9/10
Introduction – 2|Inciting Incident – 2|Obstacles – 2|Climax – 2|Falling Action – 1

Next up, we’re chugging right along into the narrative arc category, which is one of the easiest categories to score highly in. First up, we’re looking at the introduction, which did perfectly. By the inciting incident, we knew who everyone was, the basic setting, and what’s going on in these people’s lives. How about the inciting incident? That was perfectly clear and set the rest of the film up for a good ride. How were the obstacles? Totally fine. There were plenty of clear obstacles in the way, just as you’d come to expect. How was the climax? The climax was perfect. It felt like a perfect culmination of everything else put together, just as it should. Alright, so how was the falling action? Well, it started to calm things down a little bit, but other than that, not the best. You never get the sensation that they are returning to a new norm, so it’s not a complete falling action.

ENTERTAINMENT SCORE – 4/10
Rewatchability – 1|Fun – 2|Impulse/Buy – 0|Impulse/Talk – 0|Sucks Audience IN – 1

Okay, so was this movie as entertaining as it wanted to be? Let’s get into that. As far as rewatchability is considered, I don’t know. I might watch it again if I was in the mood, but I don’t see myself looking for the film anytime soon. Is this a film I would consider fun while watching? Oh yeah, absolutely. Whatever technical problems the movie may or may not have, it is definitely fun, and that’s something no one can take away from it. Do I have any impulse to buy it? No way, Jose! What about talking to somebody about the film that hasn’t heard of it? I really have no impulse to tell anybody about it, honestly. Does this suck you in, though? Maybe in certain parts, but definitely not throughout.

SPECIALTY SCORE – 35/50
Action – 10|Comedy – 5|Ryan Reynolds – 5|Sam Jackson – 5|Halfway Decent – 10

Now onto the specialty questions that I asked before seeing the film. I first wanted to know how well the action is done in this film, and it definitely has no problem there. The film is definitely action-oriented, full points there. Next, how was the comedy. As I’ve said before, it works sometimes and doesn’t sometimes, so half points. Next, I wanted to know how this film works for both Reynolds and Jackson. In both cases, it was fine, but it’s not the movie I’d mention when talking about the actors – so, half points there. Finally, was it halfway decent? Like I normally say – yes. The director did what they wanted to do for the film, and that usually warrants full points.

TOTAL – 64

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